Broken, Constantly Being Repaired

Music has always been an important part of my life. There have been times where I just did not know how to put into words what I was feeling; so I would turn to a song. I have always been able to count on music to help me express what I am feeling. I love to sit and carefully listen to a song to really hear what is being said. Powerful music combined with inspiring lyrics can hit home with me.

Today, I was introduced to a Hillsong United song. I love Hillsong and have been listening to them everyday for about a month now, but somehow managed to miss this beautiful song. The song is titled Broken Vessels and is more than nine minutes long with only two verses and a chorus. It is one of those songs that is so incredibly simple, but tugs at every single one of my heart strings. It makes me want to fall to my knees and lift my arms to praise the One True King; and let me tell you, there are very few worship songs that I find that powerful.

The first verse:
All these pieces
Broken and scattered
In mercy gathered
Mended and whole
Empty handed
But not forsaken
I’ve been set free

I have made a lot of mistakes. I have made so many mistakes that have left me feeling broken, empty, and useless. I have felt beyond repair and hopeless. I spent several years dwelling on the feeling of being too far gone for help. I would try to move on, but then I would hear the ever taunting voice telling me I was not good enough, that I did not have anything left to give, that I was too broken. I wasted too much time dwelling on the fact that I could not pick the broken pieces up. I am not sure what was the final straw or what finally caused me to come to my senses; but I realized that I was right, I could not pick up the pieces, but I did not have to pick up the pieces. What I did have to do was rely on the one who gave His life for me, because HE was going to pick up all of my broken pieces. In mercy, He gathered all of my broken and scattered pieces. He mended my broken spirit, put me back together, and made me whole. I went to Him, but it did not matter how badly broken I was, He never forsook me. He set me free from my pain.

Chorus:
Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost
But now I’m found
Was blind but now I see

Oh I can see it now
Oh I can see the love in Your eyes
Laying yourself down
Raising up the broken to life

The first part of the chorus is familiar to most people. It is such a simple verse with so much meaning. I think it is the anthem for new believers. We are all lost until the Savior finds His way into our lives. Once we accept Him to be our personal Savior, we are no longer blinded by the idea that we can do it on our own. The veil is removed from our eyes and we become aware of our never ending need of His grace and love. Without Him our lives become meaningless. Then, to just imagine the picture of the all-powerful, almighty Jesus Christ hanging on the cross. He hung on that cross for each and every one of us! He laid His life down for you! He laid His life down for me! He rose from the dead three days later so that we could be free of sin. He loved us so much that He took all of our sins upon Himself and now, all we have to do is accept Him and repent. He wants to take each and every one of our broken souls and build us up and create us into something great.

Second Verse:
You take our failure
You take our weakness
You set Your treasure
In jars of clay
So take this heart, Lord
I’ll be Your vessel
The world to see
Your love in me

Reading these words bring tears to my eyes, because for so long I did not think that I could ever be used for anything good. He took my failure, He took my weakness, and He uses them for greatness. I failed in so many different things. I set goals for myself. I set morals. I set ideals. I did not meet my goals, I sacrificed my morals, and I lowered my standards. I believed in God. I knew He existed and I believed that He wanted me; but somewhere along the way I lost site of Him and began to walk down a treacherous path. I allowed depression to replace His love. I allowed my own coping skills to replace His grace and forgiveness. I allowed sinful desires to replace His holy calling on my life. I pushed Him out of my life and I set myself up for failure after failure. With each failure I became weaker and weaker, until I could not stand on my own anymore. He used my weakness to get my attention. Once I realized that I was nothing without Him, I went crawling back into His arms. He used my failures to teach me where I needed Him most. He continues to use my failures when I come across someone who is walking down the same path that I did. I am able to share my testimony in hopes that they will not walk as far as I did, but to show that there is hope no matter how far gone you feel. He still sees me as a treasure even though I am not perfect. He took my heart of clay and continues to mold it into a heart that desires His will and desires to glorify Him. He continues to mold me and change me so that He can use me as His vessel.

My heart has changed completely. I went from feeling broken beyond repair to broken constantly being repaired. He is working on me and will be working on me until the day that I leave this earth. He has plans for me and a calling for my life. He wants to use me to glorify Him and to lift up His name. I am His vessel to spread the good news of His name. He calls each and every one of us into His kingdom, yet over and over again so many of us push Him away thinking that we can do it on our own. I am here to tell you that you do not have to do it on your own! He desperately longs for you to cry out to Him for help and to lean on Him when your strength is not enough. Life on earth will never be perfect. We will always have days where we feel broken and weak, but all we have to do is turn to Jesus Christ who seeks to comfort us in our sorrows. We will always fail ourselves and those around us, but our Heavenly Father wants us failure and all.

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